Posts Tagged ‘Family’
Posted on October 16, 2009 - by rfrank
Happy Birthday Luci!
Our baby girl, Luci, turns five today! Happy birthday Luci!
I took the day off today and we’ve been doing everything Luci wants to do. We had cinnamon rolls for breakfast (her favorite), went to the YMCA to swim this morning (she loves swimming), ate lunch at McDonalds, and now we’re getting ready for her birthday party. She’s into frogs right now, so it’s a frog party!
I can’t believe that five years ago today Luci was born. I remember it like it was yesterday. Being a dad has to be one of the coolest things in the world. There’s no greater responsibility in the world and nothing any more rewarding.
Today is about Luci, so I’m turning off the computer. Besides, I have balloons to blow up.
Posted on September 29, 2009 - by rfrank
Disconnecting from the electronic world
This spring Beth and I celebrated our 10-year wedding anniversary. Someone found an old wedding picture of us and tagged me on Facebook (are we friends?). That picture should be outlawed! I hope I look more cool today than I did back then!
Tomorrow we leave for vacation to celebrate our anniversary. I told Beth that I have been thinking about this big trip for a few years and I can’t believe it’s finally here. We’re doing a European tour – Venice, Rome, Pisa, Spain, the whole 9 yards.
I am going to try doing something on this trip (although Evan Doyle doubts I can really do it). I am going to disconnect from the electronic world. I’m taking my laptop and iPhone, but I’m not going to stress out about the blog, Twitter updates, Facebook and email. If you see a few new blog posts, it’s not because I added them! Evan will be adding some posts while I am gone. And if you email me, you probably won’t hear from me because my assistant, Lara, is handling my email while I’m gone.
I’m jazzed about getting away and spending some QT with the most important person in my life after God – Beth. We will miss our litle Luci to pieces, but we know she’ll be in good hands with her grandmas and grandpas.
I’ve gotta run. I need to make sure I packed my toothbrush. See you in two weeks.
Posted on July 19, 2009 - by rfrank
My first nephew
Yesterday my brother, Nick, and sister-in-law, Kristy, had a baby boy! He entered the world while we were on a flight heading to vacation. Welcome to the world Ryder Allen Frank! Uncle Ryan and Aunt Beth loves you and can’t wait to get home and hold you! Your cousin Luci is ready to start playing and bossing you around!
“Lord, thank you for my new nephew, Ryder. I ask that by God’s grace, Ryder will come to trust in Jesus Christ alone for the forgiveness of his sins early in life. I ask that He would love you with all of his heart, soul, mind and strength. I pray that he will follow you all the days of his life. Amen.”
“One more thing, Lord. Thank you for giving him his uncle Ryan’s good looks.”
Posted on July 2, 2009 - by rfrank
22 steps to adultery
Am I going X-rated on my blog? I guess so but for a good cause. I’m convinced more than ever that the devil loves bringing leaders down. One of the biggest things that will destroy your ministry is sexual sin. I remember being a senior in high school and the devastation that I experienced when my youth pastor was caught in a sexual affair.
I love my wife! She loves God, loves me, and is the sexiest woman I know. I’m committed today more than ever to sexual purity. By God’s grace, I have been faithful to my wife and by His grace I will remain faithful.
Several years ago a guy in my church gave me a stack of papers that he picked up from a counseling conference. Included in that stack was a sheet with the chain of events that lead to adultery. I came across those notes this morning and want to paraphrase it for you in 22 steps.
1. You meet someone (the circumstances vary).
2. You grow more and more aware of that particular person.
3. You spend time thinking about that person.
4. There is a series of unplanned, innocent contacts. This can be in person or electronic (email, Facebook, etc).
5. In your mind, you compare that person to your present husband or wife.
6. You spend time thinking about how unhappy you are.
7. The unplanned, innocent contacts develop into planned, intentional contacts.
8. You find ways to seek the other person out to talk and have conversations. Again, this can be online, by email or by text.
9. You realize that you feel good when you’re with the other person.
10. You start comparing. You compare the way you feel about this person with the way you feel about your spouse. You compare how the other person treats you compared to how your spouse treats you.
11. You look for ways you can be with the other person for legitimate reasons.
12. There is an exchange of apparently innocent forms of physical affection.
13. Innocent forms of affection quickly turn to embracing and kissing.
14. You experience a struggle with your conscience.
15. The desire to be in contact with each other continues.
16. You engage in actual sexual involvement.
17. You plan frequent covert meetings.
18. You are now living a double life.
19. Others become suspicious and confront you.
20. You are defensive and you deny everything.
21. At some point, the truth rises to the surface (and mark this down: it will).
22. It’s decision time. You have three choices:
a. First, you decide to continue having the affair (or other affairs) and remain married.
b. Second, you make plans to separate and get divorced.
c. You repent and seek help.
After you have read through these steps to adultery, why don’t you pray and ask God to keep you pure and faithful to your spouse? If you need to repent and get help, don’t want. Take care of it today.
Posted on June 2, 2009 - by rfrank
Your first 12 months in children’s ministry
People starting in children’s ministry often ask me what they should focus on the first 12 months of their ministry. Here are ten essentials.
1. Build solid connections with leadership. Set a weekly meeting time with your pastor. If you don’t schedule it, it won’t happen.
2. Choose your battles carefully. As the old saying goes, “major on the major and minor on the minor.” I’ve been the children’s pastor at my church for 12 years and I still have to choose my battles carefully.
3. Set a pattern of God first, family second, and ministry third. You have to establish this pattern from week one. Guard your day off. Let your spouse and kids know that they are more important to you than your job.
4. Smooze the church secretary. I know they have a reputation of being hard to deal with, but they know everything about the church and how things work. Church secretaries can be your best friend or your worst enemy – so determine to make her your best friend from the start.
5. Expect some criticism. You won’t be at the church for 30 days before someone tells you how it “use to be done” or “what they have found that works”. Accept the criticism with grace, nod your head and listen, then move ahead with your plans.
6. Take time to assess the church. Some of the best assessment will come when you volunteer to buy the youth pastor lunch. Spend time with the other members of the church staff. Ask who the power people are in the church. Learn who the money people are (normally the senior citizens). Find out where the church is weak and where it is strong. Discover the hot topics.
7. Bring parents on board with your vision and plan. Your #1 job as a children’s pastor is to help mom and dad raise Godly kids so involve them in your plans.
8. Pace yourself. Babies are born one at a time for a reason – your new ideas need to be too. Don’t try to do everything you have dreamed about in the first twelve months.
9. Connect with other children’s pastors. You need to do this locally, at conferences, and online. Get on Twitter and follow great children’s pastors like Sam Luce and Monica Morgan. Don’t try to do it alone.
10. Subscribe to K! Magazine. You don’t expect me to leave this out, do you? It’s one of the best resource out for children’s pastors and it’s less than 20 bucks a year. Ask around – you’ve gotta have it.
Posted on May 21, 2009 - by rfrank
6 good words
I’m team-teaching an adult elective class at my church right now on the hurried family. The guy I’m teaching with was talking about the importance of making your time at home really count. A few weeks ago he said, “When you’re there, be there.” Those are six good words, agree?
I’ve had a hard time getting away from those words the past few weeks. Here’s how I’ve applied it to my life at home.
1. I will wait until Luci goes to sleep before I crack open my laptop.
2. I will give Beth and Luci my undivided attention.
3. My day off will really be a day off. In other words, I’ll do everything in my power not to work on church and ministry stuff.
4. I’ll really be the spiritual leader in my home and not just talk about it.
5. I’ll put my family first.
Posted on May 17, 2009 - by rfrank
Tradition breeds loyalty
I spent a good part of the day Saturday with my family at Purdue University. It was my sister-in-law’s graduation. It was the longest ceremony I’ve ever sat through but was also the best I’ve attended. Two things have really impressed me about Purdue – tradition and loyalty.
First, tradition. The school was founded in 1869 and is packed with tradition. It is probably best known for the Purdue University College of Engineering (my soon-to-be brother-in-law is part of this program). It’s also cool that 22 of Purdue’s graduates are astronauts, including Gus Grissom (one of the original Mercury 7 astronauts), Neil Armstrong (the first person to walk on the moon), and Eugene Cernan (the last person to walk on the moon).
Second, I was impressed with the loyalty of Purdue grads. They love their Alma Mater and are gold and black through and through.
I’ve been thinking about these 2 words this weekend: tradition and loyalty. Tradition breeds loyalty. Purdue alumni are loyal to their their Alma Mater in part due to deep traditions.
Apply this to children’s ministry. My goal as a children’s pastor is to help parents raise Godly kids – kids that are loyal and true to Jesus Christ. Does tradition factor into the equation? I think it does.
Many of us get scared by the word tradition because it sounds cold and irrelevant. But is it? If tradition breeds loyalty, what traditions do we need to make sure we are teaching the kids in our church? What traditions do we need remind parents to pass on to their kids?
Posted on May 14, 2009 - by rfrank
I love being “Uncle Ryan”
My baby sister had her first baby this week. Her name is Laila. I don’t know how to explain it other than amazing. I love being Uncle Ryan.
My sister and her husband are in my Sunday School class at church. I emailed the class to let them know that the baby was born. I was one excited uncle. So excited that I got my facts mixed up and said the baby weighed 20 pounds and was 7.5 inches long. Oops.
Laila now joins Lani as my second niece. My first nephew is on the way. Life is good. Nieces and nephews make it better!
Posted on May 8, 2009 - by rfrank
The cost of living in the country
I love where I live. I live out in the country about 7 miles from my church and 12 miles from the KidzMatter offices. There are four houses in “my mile” of the road. When we bought this property five years ago to build, I fell in love. The one thing I didn’t consider when I bought the land and built the house? How I would connect to the internet.
There are no good options. I checked into running a T1 line, but that was going to cost me about $600 a month. Ouch. I have begged and begged for AT&T to bring DSL our way. I even offered to pay for them to bring it down our road. They said “no thanks”. So for the past few years, we have had wireless “high speed” (in quotation marks intentionally) internet from a local internet provider. To call it high speed is a stretch. At it’s best, it functions at the speed of dial up. During busy times (evenings especially) it goes dead.
We finally decided that enough is enough. We’ve seen the HughesNet commercials on our Dish and I made the call. They came today to do the install and I’m happy to tell you that my internet is running pretty fast (that’s relative I know). But guess what, it looks like I am trying to contact the moon with the satellite! It’s huge! Just look at the picture! This means that now I have three ugly satellite dishes on my house (Dish TV, Hughes Net, and my other internet dish). Do I qualify as a geek?
-
About Ryan
Ryan Frank is a husband, dad, children's pastor, creator of KidzMatter, and publisher of K! Magazine.
