Posts Tagged ‘Parents’

Posted on February 1, 2010 - by rfrank

American Idol and Children’s Ministry

Season 9 of American Idol is underway. Thousands of people are lining the streets of cities like Dallas and Chicago for their once-in-a-lifetime shot at an American Idol audition. This show has taken off like mad and has thousands of would-be stars giving it their all for that lucky golden ticket and a shot at fame. They range from awesome to awful and from fabulous to foul.

Over the next few days, I’m going to share some leadership tips that we can all learn from watching American Idol.

Idol Lesson #1: Everyone wants to be a somebody. A high-point in the season for many viewers are the first few shows of each season when thousands of high-hoped contestants are shocked to discover they don’t have what it takes to be the next star. They line up a mile long and a mile deep to get their chance to be the next American Idol only to be told they don’t have what it takes.

Everyone wants to be a somebody. This is a basic need that everyone has. Ready for the good news? Everyone can be someone in Christ! What a prime opportunity we have to share this with people when they are little – in children’s ministry! Do your kids know that they are special? Not because of what they do, but because of who they are in Christ?

Idol Lesson #2: Everyone wants face time with the leader. Tens of thousands line up hoping to show their goods. What a lot of TV viewers don’t realize is that less than 100 are actually permitted to stand in front of Simon, Randy, Kara and the guest judge. Those 100, as well as their other thousand-plus competitors, actually begin their audition process over a week prior, auditioning before several other layers of judges. They each want face to face time with the judges – the Supreme Court of reality TV.

Your volunteers, your kids, your parents, your staff share this in common: they want face to face time with you. Are you giving it to them? Unfortunately, you don’t have the option of picking and choosing on this one. After all, pastoral work is about people. Giving your people face to face time is vital to your ministry. When is the last time you stepped into every classroom at the church to spend a few minutes talking to your leaders? Have you been getting on your knees to talk to the kids that call you their pastor?

There you go – the first two lessons from American Idol that I’ve been thinking on. I’ll post the next two in a few days. Oh, in case you are wondering, I won’t be making any connections between children’s ministry and Pants on the Ground. Don’t even ask.

Posted on November 12, 2009 - by rfrank

9 trends in CM leadership – part 9

Trend #9: A growing percentage of parents are more committed to the extracurriculars than the programs of the church.

The Barna Reseach Group has helped the church understand the spiritual condition of today’s kids. I won’t repeat all of his findings but you should read Transforming Children Into Spiritual Champions (Regal). Raising a Modern-Day Joseph affirms this research.

The bottom line is this: it’s not a good picture. Kids are growing up in the church and heading for college with a low commitment to the church, an unbiblical worldview, and decreasing Bible knowledge. At the same time that the spiritual condition of children is declining, involvement in extracurricular activities like sports, piano, and dance is increasing. More and more parents are choosing these activities over other children’s ministries in the church.

There are clear benefits to children being involved in sports and other similar activities. Better health and self-esteem are two such benefits. However, I see an increasing number of parents in the church choose these activities over programs like Awana, Pioneer Clubs, Missionettes, Royal Rangers, or even worship services.

At my church we have Awana. It provides what kids need so desperately—a biblical foundation upon which to build the rest of their lives. It is also one of the best tools we offer parents who want to grow spiritual champions.

I recently wrote a blog post called “What Bugs Me About Little League.” I said it bugs me that so many parents in my church idolize Little League and let it trump Awana night. When faced with the choice of baseball practice or Awana, baseball practice wins. Within hours I was bombarded with comments from children’s pastors that both understood my concern and respectfully disagreed.

Most of those who disagreed took the position that engaging in the community is just as important as involvement in the programs of the church. Carmen Fleck from Bachelor Creek Friends Church said, “The Bible says we are to be salt and light to our communities … sports is a great way to do that. I think sometimes we Christians become ‘too Christian’ and remove ourselves from the community, thus never becoming salt and light.”

Jonathon Cliff from Trinity Church said, “You are assuming that ‘church’ provides the only form of spiritual formation in a child’s life. I’m a children’s pastor, and have struggled for years with the twinge of bitterness when families choose other activities over the ones I’ve planned, and prayerfully organized for their own children, but sometimes spending time together as a family, enjoying sports, can be more beneficial to the life of a family than anything I could ever plan at church.”

Here is my concern. Most Christian parents agree that they want their children to be spiritual champions as adults. However, they lack the strategy to hit those results. Part of the plan must include a commitment to God, His Word, and programs of the church intended to help parents grow godly kids. When anything and everything trumps the plan, the plan is destined to fail. Any strategic planner would tell you that a plan is only as good as one’s commitment to executing it.

Conclusion

It is indeed an exciting day in children’s ministry. The last five years have brought so many changes to the face of children’s ministry. The next five years will be equally as exciting. Children’s ministry leaders must keep their ear on the rail and commit to keeping a keen eye on new trends. Upon discovering them, each must ask, “What impact does this have where I live?” You don’t have to (nor should you) embrace each, but you are wise for keeping them on your radar and embracing the ones that will make you and your ministry stronger.

Posted on July 7, 2009 - by edoyle

Tuesday Talk: Sam Luce

Tuesday Talk is a weekly feature on Ryan Frank’s blog. Each week, I interview one children’s ministry expert and ask for their answer to a question. Check back every Tuesday for a new interview.

This week on Tuesday Talk:
Sam Luce answers the question, “How can you use Twitter to enhance your Children’s ministry?”

1. Communicate with volunteers.
I have started the process of using twitter with my volunteers. I created multiple accounts. One is for Small group leaders, another for Logistics (the check in security crowd), a large group one for our producers and communicators, and a preschool one. At a campus level I created one for each campus for updates on a broader scale that would be helpful for parents and volunteers.

2. Communicate with parents.
This year I plan on communicating from camp primarily though twitter updates. Praise requests, fun quotes from kids, kids saying Hi to mom and dad. I hope to use it as something we can build from year to year.

3. Communicate vision, values and best practices.
As more of our volunteers get on twitter I will use it as a reminder of our vision and how they can practically put to action our vision and values through small practical tips. Another thing that is great is the ability to send links that point volunteers to blog posts and videos that will help train them to be more effective in what they do. Again making ministry specific twitter user names is essential to keep people zoned in on only the twitters that pertain to them.

4. Communicate with loads of kids pastors.
As a kids pastor if you are not leveraging Twitter to connect with and learn from other kids pastors you are nuts. Twitter is by far the best place to get instant feedback to know if an idea is good or stupid. To find out what other kids pastors are doing that is working. Also if you are using Fellowship One or 252basics there are many others that are doing the same so twitter can be leveraged in a huge way to collaborate with others doing ministry in with many of the same tools you are.

5. Communicate with Ryan!
Lastly through the power of Twitter you can learn that Ryan (@r_frank) likes hot dogs.  (Editors note: Because we always knew you cared!)

See you in the Twitterverse!

Sam Luce has been the children’s Pastor at Mt. Zion Ministries Church in Utica, NY for 11 years. He is passionate about reaching kids and equipping families. Sam is married to his beautiful wife Sandra they have two boys and their first girl. For more info about Sam (and his brief stint as a Twitter fugitive) go to www.samluce.com.

Posted on June 16, 2009 - by rfrank

Tuesday Talk: Larry Fowler

Tuesday Talk is a weekly feature on Ryan Frank’s blog.  Each week, I interview one children’s ministry expert and ask for their answer to a question.  Check back every Tuesday for a new interview.

This week on Tuesday Talk:
Larry Fowler answers the question, “How can a ministry help parents raise modern-day Josephs?”

Wow–there could be so many responses, so let me mention three that I think are key:
1. Don’t let them off the hook.  In other words, never stop talking about the fact that, Biblically speaking, parents are first responsible for spiritual training.  Keep reminding them in every communication that you do, but of course in a loving, encouraging way.

2. Work on motivating parents.  We do a pretty good job of making parents feel guilty, but what do we do to help them to want to raise their kids spiritually?  Use both extrinsic and intrinsic–recognize, reward, celebrate, personally commend, challenge, and whatever else might motivate.  I believe this is the missing piece; the Biblical pattern is clear, and there are certainly enough tools available.  So why don’t parents use them?  They’re not motivated.

3. Give them a target.  Parents are so motivated when they have a target; just let them hear that their soccer player could star on a club team with more practice, and watch them respond.  That’s why I talk about a modern-day Joseph so much: because the Old Testament Joseph story so beautifully portrays what we would like our kids to turn out to be once they leave home.  Then, add intermediate targets–what children should know and become at two- to four-year intervals throughout their growing up years.  Celebrate with and honor the parents who work with their children to reach those targets.

Larry Fowler serves as executive director of global training for Awana, an international organization committed to helping churches and parents raise children and youth to know, love and serve Jesus Christ. He is an author of two books and a speaker to audiences worldwide both inside and outside of Awana. Larry and his wife, Diane, have two grown children and seven grandchildren. The Fowlers reside in suburban Chicago.

Posted on June 2, 2009 - by rfrank

Your first 12 months in children’s ministry

People starting in children’s ministry often ask me what they should focus on the first 12 months of their ministry. Here are ten essentials.

1. Build solid connections with leadership. Set a weekly meeting time with your pastor. If you don’t schedule it, it won’t happen.

2. Choose your battles carefully. As the old saying goes, “major on the major and minor on the minor.” I’ve been the children’s pastor at my church for 12 years and I still have to choose my battles carefully.

3. Set a pattern of God first, family second, and ministry third. You have to establish this pattern from week one. Guard your day off. Let your spouse and kids know that they are more important to you than your job.

4. Smooze the church secretary. I know they have a reputation of being hard to deal with, but they know everything about the church and how things work. Church secretaries can be your best friend or your worst enemy – so determine to make her your best friend from the start.

5. Expect some criticism. You won’t be at the church for 30 days before someone tells you how it “use to be done” or “what they have found that works”. Accept the criticism with grace, nod your head and listen, then move ahead with your plans.

6. Take time to assess the church. Some of the best assessment will come when you volunteer to buy the youth pastor lunch. Spend time with the other members of the church staff. Ask who the power people are in the church. Learn who the money people are (normally the senior citizens). Find out where the church is weak and where it is strong. Discover the hot topics.

7. Bring parents on board with your vision and plan. Your #1 job as a children’s pastor is to help mom and dad raise Godly kids so involve them in your plans.

8. Pace yourself. Babies are born one at a time for a reason – your new ideas need to be too. Don’t try to do everything you have dreamed about in the first twelve months.

9. Connect with other children’s pastors. You need to do this locally, at conferences, and online. Get on Twitter and follow great children’s pastors like Sam Luce and Monica Morgan. Don’t try to do it alone.

10. Subscribe to K! Magazine. You don’t expect me to leave this out, do you? It’s one of the best resource out for children’s pastors and it’s less than 20 bucks a year. Ask around – you’ve gotta have it.

Posted on May 17, 2009 - by rfrank

Tradition breeds loyalty

I spent a good part of the day Saturday with my family at Purdue University. It was my sister-in-law’s graduation. It was the longest ceremony  I’ve ever sat through but was also the best I’ve attended. Two things have really impressed me about Purdue – tradition and loyalty.

First, tradition. The school was founded in 1869 and is packed with tradition. It is probably best known for the Purdue University College of Engineering (my soon-to-be brother-in-law is part of this program). It’s also cool that 22 of Purdue’s graduates are astronauts, including Gus Grissom (one of the original Mercury 7 astronauts), Neil Armstrong (the first person to walk on the moon), and Eugene Cernan (the last person to walk on the moon).

Second, I was impressed with the loyalty of Purdue grads. They love their Alma Mater and are gold and black through and through.

I’ve been thinking about these 2 words this weekend: tradition and loyalty. Tradition breeds loyalty. Purdue alumni are loyal to their their Alma Mater in part due to deep traditions.

Apply this to children’s ministry. My goal as a children’s pastor is to help parents raise Godly kids – kids that are loyal and true to Jesus Christ. Does tradition factor into the equation? I think it does.

Many of us get scared by the word tradition because it sounds cold and irrelevant. But is it? If tradition breeds loyalty, what traditions do we need to make sure we are teaching the kids in our church? What traditions do we need remind parents to pass on to their kids?