Who Are Your Guys? (Or Girls)

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Howard Hendricks was a professor at Dallas Theological Seminary. He would ask his pastoral students this question. He would say, "Who are your guys? Who are your guys?" To the girls, he’d ask this question, "Who are your girls?"

What he meant was this, that you always need to have a small group of people that you are mentoring or investing in, that you are pouring yourself into. Andy Stanley has this Hallmark phrase that you've probably heard a million times, "Do for one what you wish you could do for all."

You can never invest, have that mentor relationship with everybody in your church and all your volunteers, so he says, "Do for one person what you wish you could do for everybody." So, who's that one person, or who's that small group of people that you could just invest in? You don't have to overthink it. Just do something. Maybe it's a monthly "Let's get together at Starbucks," once a month, or, "come over to the house every so often," and just invest in them. That means a lot and it doesn't have to be young people that you do that for, but for young people coming up, I don't know if there's a better use of your time. I think having a mentor, and I don't know that you even have to ask someone, "Will you be my mentor?" I think you can. I think it can just be, maybe you find somebody in the church or in the community that you can learn from, whether it's a pastor or somebody you looked up to, or, wherever you're at in your phase of life.

There's a guy right now that is my mentor, although I've never asked him to be my mentor. He is a business man in our community that I've gotten to know, whose kids are grown up and he is super intentional now with what he's doing with his grandkids, and I need to learn from this guy. I'm going to pick up some business things from him, but I really need him to bleed on me a little bit on this whole being a dad, and so every six weeks, I'll call him and ask him if he'll go to lunch, and he's never said no one time.  

Now, I've never asked him. I think if I would have asked him, "Hey, I need a mentor. Would you be my mentor?" He might have said yes, but he's so busy, and I don't know if he would have said yes, but by me asking the first time, "Can we go to lunch?" I’ve just really gleaned and asked questions and value him, and he's never said no to a lunch, and he's my mentor.

We each need someone like that in our lives, and I have also, (you probably do too), but there are people ...I've got a couple of podcast pastors I've never met in my life, but they are pastors that I listen to their podcasts, their sermons, and I really kind of view them as a mentor, although I can't ask them questions and that kind of stuff. They really inspire me, and I learn a lot from them. So, find those kind of people in your life that you can learn from, and that can make all the difference in the world. It's not any fun doing life ministry alone in a silo. We all need people speaking into our lives, and then we need to pay it forward and speak it into others, don't we?

Your #1 fan,


Ryan Frank